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Hey dw. Last I posted, i was on a post-show high. good shit.
Z was gone all weekend. Friday Sabrina and I hung out. She gave me some sweet ass birthday presents INCLUDING A HUMAN FUCKING RIB, and then we caught ciders at fair weather. Got to see her new place which is nicer than the last place.
Saturday was my chill day. I went to the gym. Worked out. Got arbys and watched russia LOSE (yus!) and got the car washed. I finally checked out all these little over-priced boutiques on 12th st. They were all hella overpriced. One place had some cute stuff but they literally only carried up to a size 5. what. the. fuck. shoulda just had a sign like "tall skinny store". whatever.
But yeah, the car hadn't been vacuumed in like 5 years, and man, the car wash people made my car look brand new. i'll definitely return.
That night I had a few shows i thought about going to, but instead just stayed in and played Ocarina of Time.
Sunday my mom got in. I got up and worked out and she was finally in around 3. We went out to Todd's place and we all got dinner together. Afterwards, we mostly hung out. I dropped mom off around 9 or so. I picked up Z from the airport at 11.
Man, I really missed him. I feel all clingy now. I just. I really missed having him around.
Mom came over last night. She saw the fish tank and met Blue and got to see some of the old stuff I had lying around since literally forever. She was pleased to know her Russian Nesting Dolls, a present from my dad to her, somehow wound up with me.
OH when I saw her Sunday, she gave me my wedding present, a quilt my great-great-grandmother made. Its at least 100 years old and it is BEAUTIFUL. all the patches are hexagons. Mom restored it beautifully (just needed restitching). I hope to take really good care of it and keep it in the family for years to come. She also brought me, like, 4 fucking kringles. lol. so. many.
Today I struggled in Silks class. Oh well. More shit to work on in private.
But! I'm about to go on vacation! Friday morning I leave for yellowstone. So this is the last you'll hear from me for a couple weeks!
Imma see mom for lunch tomorrow. She heads home tomorrow either way it seems. I might meet Z with Kirt and Justin for breakfast tomorrow morning too. Might not though. Its a lot for one day. Thursday evening we'll hang out with Kirt and Shane should be getting in too. I'll need to be packed by Thursday night.
Yesterday, i dont know why, but all the anxiety of packing for the trip and then going on the trip just really set me off. I think talking about this paperweight i have which was involved in a particularly terrible scenario was what set me off. but when i was by myself, it was very bad. i didnt hurt myself but i sure did think about it. it'd been a while since I felt so terribly. Funny how our family of origin stuff (or something) can bring this out.
Yesterday I also beat Ocarina of Time!! I died on Ganon once. I am never putting another video game on my bucket list again lol. But I can see why it was revolutionary. And once I got the hang of it, 3d wasnt so bad. Idk if it'll make me try psychonauts again though (i got motion sickness).
I got into an internet argument with E about straws. I'm pretty anti disposable plastic straws. And apparently that makes me ableist. I felt bad because I didnt mean for it to ramp up or upset her and cause her to have a major panic attack. I just felt ardently and i still dont think I'm being ableist. If there is someone who requires a straw to consume a beverage they could bring their own, or starbucks could provide an non-plastic alternative. whatever. i guess im a bad social justice person now. we also got into an argument on how "little things like this do nothing". which, like, they probably don't tbh. but i sway between taoism where my little things affect stuff, and nihilism where i just dont take care of shit because nothing matters and tbh i like taoist raye better than fuck the world raye.
whatever.
At any rate, thats about all i have going on. I'll talk to you in a couple weeks unless something goes cataclysmicaly wrong. cya dw.
Z was gone all weekend. Friday Sabrina and I hung out. She gave me some sweet ass birthday presents INCLUDING A HUMAN FUCKING RIB, and then we caught ciders at fair weather. Got to see her new place which is nicer than the last place.
Saturday was my chill day. I went to the gym. Worked out. Got arbys and watched russia LOSE (yus!) and got the car washed. I finally checked out all these little over-priced boutiques on 12th st. They were all hella overpriced. One place had some cute stuff but they literally only carried up to a size 5. what. the. fuck. shoulda just had a sign like "tall skinny store". whatever.
But yeah, the car hadn't been vacuumed in like 5 years, and man, the car wash people made my car look brand new. i'll definitely return.
That night I had a few shows i thought about going to, but instead just stayed in and played Ocarina of Time.
Sunday my mom got in. I got up and worked out and she was finally in around 3. We went out to Todd's place and we all got dinner together. Afterwards, we mostly hung out. I dropped mom off around 9 or so. I picked up Z from the airport at 11.
Man, I really missed him. I feel all clingy now. I just. I really missed having him around.
Mom came over last night. She saw the fish tank and met Blue and got to see some of the old stuff I had lying around since literally forever. She was pleased to know her Russian Nesting Dolls, a present from my dad to her, somehow wound up with me.
OH when I saw her Sunday, she gave me my wedding present, a quilt my great-great-grandmother made. Its at least 100 years old and it is BEAUTIFUL. all the patches are hexagons. Mom restored it beautifully (just needed restitching). I hope to take really good care of it and keep it in the family for years to come. She also brought me, like, 4 fucking kringles. lol. so. many.
Today I struggled in Silks class. Oh well. More shit to work on in private.
But! I'm about to go on vacation! Friday morning I leave for yellowstone. So this is the last you'll hear from me for a couple weeks!
Imma see mom for lunch tomorrow. She heads home tomorrow either way it seems. I might meet Z with Kirt and Justin for breakfast tomorrow morning too. Might not though. Its a lot for one day. Thursday evening we'll hang out with Kirt and Shane should be getting in too. I'll need to be packed by Thursday night.
Yesterday, i dont know why, but all the anxiety of packing for the trip and then going on the trip just really set me off. I think talking about this paperweight i have which was involved in a particularly terrible scenario was what set me off. but when i was by myself, it was very bad. i didnt hurt myself but i sure did think about it. it'd been a while since I felt so terribly. Funny how our family of origin stuff (or something) can bring this out.
Yesterday I also beat Ocarina of Time!! I died on Ganon once. I am never putting another video game on my bucket list again lol. But I can see why it was revolutionary. And once I got the hang of it, 3d wasnt so bad. Idk if it'll make me try psychonauts again though (i got motion sickness).
I got into an internet argument with E about straws. I'm pretty anti disposable plastic straws. And apparently that makes me ableist. I felt bad because I didnt mean for it to ramp up or upset her and cause her to have a major panic attack. I just felt ardently and i still dont think I'm being ableist. If there is someone who requires a straw to consume a beverage they could bring their own, or starbucks could provide an non-plastic alternative. whatever. i guess im a bad social justice person now. we also got into an argument on how "little things like this do nothing". which, like, they probably don't tbh. but i sway between taoism where my little things affect stuff, and nihilism where i just dont take care of shit because nothing matters and tbh i like taoist raye better than fuck the world raye.
whatever.
At any rate, thats about all i have going on. I'll talk to you in a couple weeks unless something goes cataclysmicaly wrong. cya dw.
