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Jan. 24th, 2019 08:52 pmso much has happened.
This weekend I bought a used car. a 2013 hyundai accent. i half-bought it because my husband hated sharing a car with me. i paid cash, but there goes about 6k in savings.
Tuesday, Z got an email from his boss effectively firing one of his friends, a brewer, there. Z was v mad and said he was going to quit out of spite/principal, because firing someone via email is horeshit. I told him that was rash, but i understood and supported him.
Z comes back the next day saying, oh he and the brewery owner hashed it out and he'll stay, but wont do any more event planning. and the brewers olympics is cancelled. but thats okay.
Only to get a text the NEXT day (today) "confirming" when his last day is.
The owner is a great guy. i couldn't, and really still cant, believe this. he's being a chicken shit and can't say what he wants or means. I'm just mad. I'm disappointed Z didn't ask him "what about yesterday" but clearly he'd just change his mind face-to-face and fire him over text again.
Still I'm scared for the future. I have savings, but now I need to really buckle down. It sucks cuz the cats broke my DDR pad and I want to make a new control box, but basically I don't want to buy anything unnecessary till Z has a new job. This is his last week I guess.
Also, its stupid I bought a car when he's about to be unemployed. We could have shared a car!!! Arrrgh!!! I obviously can't take it back!!
That said, he will do all the chores till he gets a job and that'll be nice. Still. One brewery says maybe they can hire him in April/May. He had another interview yesterday, altho he said he wasn't really feeling it. Idk. Its all v uncertain. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't worried.
Wrestling is.. I am sore. I am sore in places I've never been sore before. Yesterday I had to stop taking falls and take some ibuprofen because I was so sore and in pain. But then we did a bunch of rope running stuff and I felt like I'd gotten really good at it by the end of it. Even other people were complimenting me.
Last night, probably thanks to drugs, was the first time I didn't wake up in pain, unable to get back to sleep. Its mostly my neck muscles. they're not used to tucking as I fall. I've, like, never worked my neck muscles before. Still. I was, and am, frustrated with myself. I hate feeling this sore. Normally my body recovers pretty quickly. Maybe I'm still just adjusting to this. I still sometimes wonder what the fuck I'm doing. But wrestling gives me joy, and, well, I'm in a year contract anyway. So I'm here.
I bought a neck massager (before Z got fired/left/whatever) and its helped too. I just hope my body gets stronger and stops holding me back.
After the show on Saturday (which the cameras broke lol and I had no job) we all went out. it was really interesting to, like, get to know people outside of the gym. everyone claims to have no egos, but we're all just real fucking egoistic. im comfortable about saying that about myself: of course i have an ego. i think my daily life is important enough to journal. i think i could maybe become a professional wrestler. ANYONE that thinks that has some kind of ego. Apparently some people made fun of me for being a mark? I honestly couldn't care less. We're wrestling fans trying to become wrestlers. if you're not a mark then why are you here?
Oh and this friday we're all competing to be a ref which is p neat. So I might get to referee some matches! we'll see how it goes tomorrow.
Works okay, but we're on another upgrade which basically doubles my work. Also, they still arent replacing people they said they'd replace in OCTOBER. Also our latest meeting with our dept seemed to forget support even existed. it was p disheartening. whatever. my job still feels secure, i think. but i feel insecure too? but that could be the fear of Z leaving his job.
my anxiety has been bad since all this started. ive been so worried things ive said/typed with good intentions are being interpreted wrong. but i dont think thats how it is. and i think people hopefully realise im just trying to be nice. i dont want people to think im manipulating them. thats like the last thing i want to do to anyone, ever.
Oh and the cats are okay. Blue decreases his meds. He might get off of them completely. He's gaining weight too which is cool. Skittles is losing, but I'm trying to fatten her up with people food which seems to be working. We'll find out next week. they're also on anti-ring worm meds for a few weeks because both their skins are fucked and ugh. its always something with these cats.
Well, I think I need to put laundry up and play some more stardew valley. this entry took too long. see ya dw.
This weekend I bought a used car. a 2013 hyundai accent. i half-bought it because my husband hated sharing a car with me. i paid cash, but there goes about 6k in savings.
Tuesday, Z got an email from his boss effectively firing one of his friends, a brewer, there. Z was v mad and said he was going to quit out of spite/principal, because firing someone via email is horeshit. I told him that was rash, but i understood and supported him.
Z comes back the next day saying, oh he and the brewery owner hashed it out and he'll stay, but wont do any more event planning. and the brewers olympics is cancelled. but thats okay.
Only to get a text the NEXT day (today) "confirming" when his last day is.
The owner is a great guy. i couldn't, and really still cant, believe this. he's being a chicken shit and can't say what he wants or means. I'm just mad. I'm disappointed Z didn't ask him "what about yesterday" but clearly he'd just change his mind face-to-face and fire him over text again.
Still I'm scared for the future. I have savings, but now I need to really buckle down. It sucks cuz the cats broke my DDR pad and I want to make a new control box, but basically I don't want to buy anything unnecessary till Z has a new job. This is his last week I guess.
Also, its stupid I bought a car when he's about to be unemployed. We could have shared a car!!! Arrrgh!!! I obviously can't take it back!!
That said, he will do all the chores till he gets a job and that'll be nice. Still. One brewery says maybe they can hire him in April/May. He had another interview yesterday, altho he said he wasn't really feeling it. Idk. Its all v uncertain. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't worried.
Wrestling is.. I am sore. I am sore in places I've never been sore before. Yesterday I had to stop taking falls and take some ibuprofen because I was so sore and in pain. But then we did a bunch of rope running stuff and I felt like I'd gotten really good at it by the end of it. Even other people were complimenting me.
Last night, probably thanks to drugs, was the first time I didn't wake up in pain, unable to get back to sleep. Its mostly my neck muscles. they're not used to tucking as I fall. I've, like, never worked my neck muscles before. Still. I was, and am, frustrated with myself. I hate feeling this sore. Normally my body recovers pretty quickly. Maybe I'm still just adjusting to this. I still sometimes wonder what the fuck I'm doing. But wrestling gives me joy, and, well, I'm in a year contract anyway. So I'm here.
I bought a neck massager (before Z got fired/left/whatever) and its helped too. I just hope my body gets stronger and stops holding me back.
After the show on Saturday (which the cameras broke lol and I had no job) we all went out. it was really interesting to, like, get to know people outside of the gym. everyone claims to have no egos, but we're all just real fucking egoistic. im comfortable about saying that about myself: of course i have an ego. i think my daily life is important enough to journal. i think i could maybe become a professional wrestler. ANYONE that thinks that has some kind of ego. Apparently some people made fun of me for being a mark? I honestly couldn't care less. We're wrestling fans trying to become wrestlers. if you're not a mark then why are you here?
Oh and this friday we're all competing to be a ref which is p neat. So I might get to referee some matches! we'll see how it goes tomorrow.
Works okay, but we're on another upgrade which basically doubles my work. Also, they still arent replacing people they said they'd replace in OCTOBER. Also our latest meeting with our dept seemed to forget support even existed. it was p disheartening. whatever. my job still feels secure, i think. but i feel insecure too? but that could be the fear of Z leaving his job.
my anxiety has been bad since all this started. ive been so worried things ive said/typed with good intentions are being interpreted wrong. but i dont think thats how it is. and i think people hopefully realise im just trying to be nice. i dont want people to think im manipulating them. thats like the last thing i want to do to anyone, ever.
Oh and the cats are okay. Blue decreases his meds. He might get off of them completely. He's gaining weight too which is cool. Skittles is losing, but I'm trying to fatten her up with people food which seems to be working. We'll find out next week. they're also on anti-ring worm meds for a few weeks because both their skins are fucked and ugh. its always something with these cats.
Well, I think I need to put laundry up and play some more stardew valley. this entry took too long. see ya dw.
