(no subject)

I see everyone saying theyre working out at home, or gonna get buff or gonna learn a language or something but i am so fucking unmotivated. i am fucking paralyzed by fear at this point. this is the point where being without medication is bad and i would love something to make this more manageable that isnt beer. can online therapists do prescriptions? considering i have been off medicine for years, i don't need a lot, its just this whole world calamity is throwing me a bit overboard. uh, but yeah, im getting distracted here. i am way too anxious to workout at home. i am barely keeping it together. I still play DDR which isnt working out to me, and thats all i got.

i am fucken a n g e r y tho. I don't know why. the last few days its just, like, my fuse it short and im mad and, i dont have any reason other than i am cooped up in the house. its been almost 2 weeks since i saw a human other than z. everything is stupid and i dont like it. idk. i think im allowed to be mad at how things are rn.

in better news, while watching aew last night, blue had drank some of zs milk. oh good kitty hes finally stealing people food! oh. bad kitty. he LITERALLY PUKED ON ME. after i cleaned up, Z kept being skeptical it was puke. well then blue went to PUKE ON Z. he then believed me lol. good kitty

the only real good thing i got going rn is animal crossing. animal crossing as sweet escape. animal crossing as anxiety soother. animal crossing as time waster. idk how many hours ive put into that game already but im certain it is at least over 20. maybe close to 30? i guess the switch wont tell me till ive been playing it for 10 days.

well, imma ddr while z is asleep and then find ways to kill time today. we might go for a hike tomorrow as long as we find a park adequately empty.