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I'm feeling chatty today.
Yesterday I went to silks. And boy did I struggle. Stuff i normally did with ease was so hard! And, like, I dont trust myself anymore. I dont trust the fabric. I was going in for a move called scorpion and i kept worrying I was going to totally botch it (it has happened before) and like I kept asking the teacher if I was OK. the teacher, Jen, I really like her. Shes super encouraging and made me feel like I belong. and I saw Laura Kate. It had been a year and a half. I missed my gym pals. I missed these sort of... like we're not irl pals, but we're gym pals. and we root for each others' success. Idk. It was simultaneously exciting, frustrating, and introspective. I should have just done some drops to get the fear/trust out of the way lol
I spend most of the night just talking with Z. talking about missing hodge, about missing Lara. talked about some feelings i'd been feeling about Vee. (im 98% sure that theyve been lying about their astrological chart and im p annoyed by it) It was nice to chat. like, idk. just nice to enjoy our time together. i really like Z. we talked a bit about how when youre younger relationships feel more intense, but that can't really last. and you cant chase new relationship highs either. i mean, i suppose you could. but we're monogamous or whatever lol. idk. it was nice.
I have a massage tonight. so I guess i'm back on that monthly.
I slept crazy good last night. Went to bed at 10:30 which is a little early and slept all the way to 8:30. I had wild ass dreams. i remember giese hill, but it was treacherous. i remember being in a school. I know Joe was there at some point. I said he had given me every wallet i have had. I think I saw other people but i dont know who. I wish I could remember more. I felt groggy for HOURS afterwards. Was it the eclipse? Or something else?
Yesterday I went to silks. And boy did I struggle. Stuff i normally did with ease was so hard! And, like, I dont trust myself anymore. I dont trust the fabric. I was going in for a move called scorpion and i kept worrying I was going to totally botch it (it has happened before) and like I kept asking the teacher if I was OK. the teacher, Jen, I really like her. Shes super encouraging and made me feel like I belong. and I saw Laura Kate. It had been a year and a half. I missed my gym pals. I missed these sort of... like we're not irl pals, but we're gym pals. and we root for each others' success. Idk. It was simultaneously exciting, frustrating, and introspective. I should have just done some drops to get the fear/trust out of the way lol
I spend most of the night just talking with Z. talking about missing hodge, about missing Lara. talked about some feelings i'd been feeling about Vee. (im 98% sure that theyve been lying about their astrological chart and im p annoyed by it) It was nice to chat. like, idk. just nice to enjoy our time together. i really like Z. we talked a bit about how when youre younger relationships feel more intense, but that can't really last. and you cant chase new relationship highs either. i mean, i suppose you could. but we're monogamous or whatever lol. idk. it was nice.
I have a massage tonight. so I guess i'm back on that monthly.
I slept crazy good last night. Went to bed at 10:30 which is a little early and slept all the way to 8:30. I had wild ass dreams. i remember giese hill, but it was treacherous. i remember being in a school. I know Joe was there at some point. I said he had given me every wallet i have had. I think I saw other people but i dont know who. I wish I could remember more. I felt groggy for HOURS afterwards. Was it the eclipse? Or something else?
no subject
Date: 2021-05-27 03:40 pm (UTC)From:I reaaaaaaaaally really want a massage so bad, was thinking I'm gonna treat myself for my birthday this year. Will be so nice.
no subject
Date: 2021-05-27 03:56 pm (UTC)From: