![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Got takers for the cat tree and stairs. Talking to Z, the tree is just simply too small for either of our cats that want to climb. Blue could fit on it, but Blue doesn't even understand object permanence so I won't keep 1 tree just for him. Both the folks who took the things seem to be real sweet folks. The person getting the tree is as obsessed with cats as I am, which is how I know they are a good person.
Blue went to the vet. Nope. Not a UTI. Him peeing on the couch again is just behavioral. Still, him and Biggie are becoming fast friends. They were both sitting on my lap today. Blue was even grooming Biggie already. Its a new record!
But gods my anxiety has been so bad, thinking everyone/everything is going to just keel over and die any minute. Apparently this is pretty normal. Post traumatic paranoia or something like that. My therapist was an absolute sweetheart to me and I feel almost okay but also just terrible. ANd thats okay. Idk. Focusing on grounding myself and just moving through some of this garbage.
I cried a lot and focused on a lot of the different anxieties Ive had. About Todd being mad at me, about the cats being a distraction from grieving todd, stuff like that. Idk. just good to feel free to vent about stuff and even explore things that i probably normally wouldnt explore. theres a certain freeing that comes from "i pay for this time, so its MY TIME".
Todds sister tried to add me on facebook today. i have just an insurmountable anxiety about it. she was fine irl, i guess, minus just blurting out how much she loves trump. but her entire facebook is just right wing misinformation. i dont want to be her friend. she has my phone number. she can text me. maybe she heard about pepper and shes mad i didnt text her. maybe she thinks im a monster cat murderer. i just want to keep her in the requests and never deal with it. Ugh. why is facebook the land of anxiety? why do i participate on a website that mostly only gives me anxiety? I'dve logged off it the rest of the day, but I have to be on it to coordinate the pick up for this cat tree.
Almost there though, i guess.
Blue went to the vet. Nope. Not a UTI. Him peeing on the couch again is just behavioral. Still, him and Biggie are becoming fast friends. They were both sitting on my lap today. Blue was even grooming Biggie already. Its a new record!
But gods my anxiety has been so bad, thinking everyone/everything is going to just keel over and die any minute. Apparently this is pretty normal. Post traumatic paranoia or something like that. My therapist was an absolute sweetheart to me and I feel almost okay but also just terrible. ANd thats okay. Idk. Focusing on grounding myself and just moving through some of this garbage.
I cried a lot and focused on a lot of the different anxieties Ive had. About Todd being mad at me, about the cats being a distraction from grieving todd, stuff like that. Idk. just good to feel free to vent about stuff and even explore things that i probably normally wouldnt explore. theres a certain freeing that comes from "i pay for this time, so its MY TIME".
Todds sister tried to add me on facebook today. i have just an insurmountable anxiety about it. she was fine irl, i guess, minus just blurting out how much she loves trump. but her entire facebook is just right wing misinformation. i dont want to be her friend. she has my phone number. she can text me. maybe she heard about pepper and shes mad i didnt text her. maybe she thinks im a monster cat murderer. i just want to keep her in the requests and never deal with it. Ugh. why is facebook the land of anxiety? why do i participate on a website that mostly only gives me anxiety? I'dve logged off it the rest of the day, but I have to be on it to coordinate the pick up for this cat tree.
Almost there though, i guess.
no subject
Date: 2021-04-09 12:06 pm (UTC)From: